Congress Passes Emergency Bill Making Laughter at Politicians a Hate Crime
The Laughter Equity Act defines chuckling at elected officials as “violence adjacent to a press conference.”
In a rare bipartisan moment of self-preservation, Congress rushed through the Laughter Equity and Dignity Act (LEADA), criminalizing any audible amusement directed at sitting politicians.
Violations include snorting at hearings, muting a livestream to cry-laugh, and sharing clips with the caption “these people run the country.” First offenses carry sensitivity training; repeat offenders face mandatory C-SPAN binge watches.
Speaker of the House called the bill “vital for democracy,” then tripped over a microphone cable, causing half the chamber to cover their mouths in silent panic.
Civil liberties groups called the law unconstitutional. Politicians called civil liberties groups mean. Comedians booked larger venues.
Planet of Memes legal analysts note that reading our headlines aloud may now require a lawyer, a safe word, and a note from your primary care clown.
